September 16, 2013
Ok I’m going to recap on my priorities. My name is Wall Grimm and this is a self check in on getting my shit together.
WALL GRIMM’S PRIORITY SHIT
1. I need to square things with Paula, and make a choice that reflects what’s best for both of us:
Well, we’re done, I moved out and I’m living with Pete. Though Paula calls and texts me often. She wants me back, but I’m kind of with Iona, but we’re not in a committed relationship. So I guess this priority is taken care of.
2. Work more and be responsible for Sharly:
Done. This week I begin my 12-8 shift, M-F. And she’s leaving me alone in the store again as well as giving me more responsibility. She says she may have me train for some managerial work, which says a lot.
3. Look for a career, not just a job:
I have almost two years of college done, but I’ve begun to look into programs so I can at least work towards my B.A. I’d have to start next semester. I also have to consider whether or not I want to go full time or part time, and what my major would be. I’m thinking psychology or writing.
4. Quit smoking:
Still down to 5, more if I have the urge to drink. Smoking at this time is keeping me in line. This is a longer term goal.
5. Start working out again:
Running 3-5 miles in the mornings before work and on the weekends. Still doing 300 sit ups and 100 push ups, give or take. Maybe I’ll increase if I have the time.
6. Get a regular sleep schedule:
This one I’m doing because I find myself going to bed earlier most nights in order to avoid the temptation of going out and drinking and drugging.
7. Take good care of Gary Oldman:
Definitely doing this, especially now that she’s my Emotional Support Service Animal. I just don’t take her anywhere that might not be the best environment for her, like the bar the other night. Though I don’t do so much bad shit these days, so she is with me 99% of the time.
8. Start referring to Gary Oldman in my journal as Gary Oldman II or just Oldman so I don’t get confused, even though it makes me laugh to write Gary Oldman in certain sentences such as “Gary Oldman likes to bite.” :
Knocking this one of my list, because I don’t really give a shit anymore.
9. Read more:
Ok what the fuck, this is a hard one. I haven’t gotten very far with Steppenwolf because of my brain issues from the Gangsta. But even before that, I was so fucked up all the time, I didn’t read much. I haven’t read a book in about a year and that just sucks. I like reading. I guess I’ll have to set the time aside to do it.
10. I suppose I’m expected to make ammends to people I’ve wronged, based on the 12 step programs I was involved in, but I haven’t been really doing any of that. And yeah, now that I’m thinking about it, maybe I should go to AA or something so I’ll put that on the list:
Go to AA meetings:
Ok so that’s where I’m at. I guess there are two priorities there that I can take off my list. That’s my shit. Speaking of shit, I love when I eat papaya because later when I take a shit it smells like papaya. Last night I had a papaya shit. It is now what I refer to as aromatherashit. I was like, “hey Pete come here and smell this.” He didn’t know what I was talking about, so he came to the bathroom. He was like, “wtf you’re asking me to smell your shit??” I said no it smells like papaya. He said, “no it smells like shit.” But yeah, I was pretty impressed with it, so whatever.
So I had this great shit, felt like I dumped about five pounds of it into the toilet, then I went to bed. And when I hit the bed I was like ohhhhh yeahhhh because sometimes your body just feels so awesome once you hit the sheets. Mine felt extra good because of the emptiness from my aromatherashit. I love that feeling.
I guess that’s it. I think the last thing is that I am going to try to make one last effort with Emma. But I’m going to wait until I’m enrolled in school. I don’t know when she will finish school, but she wants to move to Spain or Italy. I would go anywhere with her, if she’d have me.
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