“The Absconded Journal of Wall Grimm as Told by Hasty” 209: Bogart And His Man Panties Full Of Nuts

Grimm has been so busy with school, mentoring Bogart, and being a good boyfriend to his new girlfriend that he has been struggling to find time to write. Last night he also confessed how much he missed writing in his journal and I knew I wanted to help him out. My name is Hasty and since he doesn’t have time to write I thought I would write a few journal entries for him.

Grimm and I met a year and a half ago at a gay bar. We both had blue hair and we were both flirty but not in a naughty way. He doesn’t realize how much I needed to have a good night that night and how he probably saved my life. Some things are better left in the past but needless to say I love Grimm. He is one of those friends I know will always be in my life.

I love hanging out with Grimm because he makes me feel young and I love the looks we get when we are together. People always assume I snagged myself a hot young boyfriend because we seem so close but this makes us both laugh because other than one quick short kiss the night I met him we have never been inappropriate. He is super attractive and exactly my type but I am married and he is much too young. I love the way we are because it feels so easy to just be us.

I haven’t seen Grimm or his roommate Pete in what seems like forever. Two days ago my husband and daughter left to go on a cruise without me for a week because I couldn’t get off work, so I decided to take a mini vacation to surprise Grimm. I never just show up places unannounced but I felt comfortable enough with them to do it. Since I had never been to their new house and I am terrible at following directions it took me some time to find the right house.

At one point, I pulled off the highway because I was running low on gas. I have never driven so many miles trying to find a gas station before in my life. In fact, I was fairly certain I had just been thrown into an episode of the living dead because there were a bunch of people out just wandering the streets as if they had nowhere special to go. Two of the people I passed were in wheelchairs. One of them was a man with a beard in a wedding dress just wheeling himself down the road and the other was in a blue bath robe at the end of a driveway drinking out of a bottle wrapped in a plastic grocery bag. I also may or may not have seen a few young kids wearing Spongebob footie pajamas carrying Uzis.

I finally stopped at an old mechanic’s shop to ask for directions. If you are picturing this like a horror movie then you understand how fast my heart was beating. The man, who looked like an older and more wrinkly version of Lurch from The Addams Family, seemed nice enough but didn’t speak English.  I determined, by the way his eyes kept darting, that I needed to go right.  My car began to sputter as I asked Siri to locate the closest station. Twelve minutes away was the best she could do. Luckily, I went right and ran into one that Siri didn’t know about.

I finally arrived in front of a nice Victorian house with a very good-looking man standing in the front yard with his back to me wearing only his briefs. I smiled because I had never met Bogart but I definitely had heard a lot about him and THIS was definitely Bogart. He was collecting nuts off the ground and sticking them in his briefs so he didn’t notice me when I pulled up and got out of my car.

“You know you probably don’t need to stuff your man panties full of nuts because the two you have are probably sufficient!” I casually said as he was basically mooning me to get a few more nuts.

He stopped in stooped position and looked back over his shoulder.


This journal entry was guest written by Hasty at https://hastywords.wordpress.com/

previous Grimm 208: The Drunken Maiden’s Morning After http://wp.me/p41c99-13u

next Grimm “The Absconded Journal of Wall Grimm as Told by Hasty” 210: Grade School Cooties and Face Lickers http://wp.me/p41c99-14l

For a list with links to all the previous journal entries go to: http://wp.me/P41c99-J

Check out the Character Directory Pages to learn about characters mentioned in each post.

Categories: JOURNAL ENTRIES 186-210 | Tags: , , , , , , , , , | 25 Comments

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25 thoughts on ““The Absconded Journal of Wall Grimm as Told by Hasty” 209: Bogart And His Man Panties Full Of Nuts

  1. Reblogged this on SageDoyle.

  2. Reblogged this on hastywords and commented:
    Please visit me at “The Journal of Wall Grimm”. Please Note: The Blog is RATED R.

  3. This showed up 3 times on my reader wall…

  4. jlcraig280

    Quite hilarious. But an interesting read, indeed.

  5. I laughed heartily…. now I want to see pictures of him in his nut-filled man panties lol

  6. The characters that populate Grimm’s journal, are funny, raunchy & funny.

  7. Well NOW WHAT?!?!?!

  8. What a nutty and wicked tale…
    I shall have to call back again
    soon and read some more of
    your awesomeness…

    Happy Thursday Sage and Hasty ;)

    Andro xx (Kisses for Hasty :) ) lol


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