Monthly Archives: October 2014

“The Journal of Wall Grimm” 208: The Drunken Maiden’s Morning After

October 2, 2014


I realize I never finished my story about the drunken maiden.  It’s not a big deal or an amazing story, I just want to finish it because it includes an important message I want to convey to myself.  I guess I left off with how I stayed up all night with her while she was puking.  Then we both fell asleep on the bathroom floor.  When I woke I carried her to my room and put her in my bed, then I went to sleep in Pete’s room because he was getting up.  The story continues with the next day.

So Pete had gone off for the day and Cola was in her room/studio painting, sculpting, whatever piece of art she was working on.  It was a Sunday so I had to work later, but once Bogart and I were up, we went out back.  I was hanging out with Astrid while Bogart was jumping on the trampoline.  He can jump for hours.  That’s an exaggeration, but it doesn’t seem like it.  You’d think he’d get tired, but it gets him more energetic.  His medication is supposed to make him sleepy, but it only does briefly after taking it, or sometimes he just crashes.  And then it’s quiet.  And then I remember what quiet sounds like…

Anyway, Megan didn’t remember anything about the night before, so when she met Cola the next morning, Cola explained why I brought her home with me.  When Cola mentioned my name, Cola told me later, Megan said, “Oh my god, I left the bar with someone named Grimm??”

When Cola brought her out back, I stood and shook her hand, since she didn’t remember me and Cola had to introduce us.  Megan said, “Oh thank god you’re Grimm.”

I was perplexed.

She said, “I was worried you might be some kind of slimy creep.”

“I’m not?”


I took that as a compliment. I’m hardly some kind of slimy creep.  That’s good.

At that point, Bogart leaped off the trampoline and came running over, looked at me while pointing at Megan, and said, “‘At’s a girl.”  I imagined if the scene had been filmed you’d see Astrid seated while Cola, Megan and I were standing.  Then off in the distance you see Bogart flipping around on the trampoline, then while he’s up in the air, arms and legs spread out, you’d see those lines like in cartoons coming out of his head or maybe an exclamation point.  Then the camera would focus on us from an angle without Bogart in the back and you’d hear the sound of rapid cartoon running and he’d seemingly appear out of no where. Or you wouldn’t hear the running at all and he’d just suddenly be there saying, “‘At’s a girl.”  Bogart is very much like a cartoon character at times.  I think he sees the world in animation anyway so that makes sense.

We introduced her to Bogart and he said, “Wot’s she doin’ ‘ere?  Is she for me?”

Hmmmm sometimes I wish I could be inside his head.  Just for a day.

Then he had to point out yet again that Cola was “a bloke in a dress.”  And once again we told him “no masterstating.”  “bwahahahahaaahahaa spot on!”

Megan really liked Bogart, to the extent that I was a little annoyed, since I was the one who brought her home, I guess there was that territorial thing going on, even though I didn’t want her.  I was in the wings with Solenne and not in a relationship.  I was free to be with anyone, but focused on Solenne.  That is still our status, by the way.

Megan was feeling pretty sick, so I went to the store to buy her Coke and crackers, getting Astrid butts, wine, toilet paper, and cat food while I was out.  I also bought Astrid a candle that smells like cookies because she burns candles all the time.  She is so happy when you give her a candle.  It’s the simplest way I’ve ever known to make someone that happy.  I like to do that for her.

When I got back from the store, Megan’s interest in Bogart had diminished, but I think that was due to her hangover.  He’s the last person you want to be around when you have a hangover.  He’s loud, he never stops talking, he bounces around you like a dog-sized puppy, and your headache and nausea are aggravated when you strain to understand him through his accent.  He had been pestering her to either jump on the trampoline with him, or go have sex with him, or at least give him a blow job.  He told her that I have a blowjob girlfriend and he wants one too.  Ah, the ironically innocent honesty.

After she ate crackers and drank Coke and took more Tylenol, she showered and freshened up, borrowing some of Cola’s makeup.  Then I took her home on the way to work.  In the car she asked if we could go out together sometime.  And I guess this is why I wanted to tell this story, because I said no.  Typically I’d have said yes, if only to get laid or something.  I take her as an easy fuck.  But I said no because she also seems to be too much in party mode and kinda careless.  I’m done that phase in my life and I don’t want it back even if it’s someone else’s world.  And I don’t want to have to take care of her.  I want someone who can take care of themselves.  I like taking care of people, that’s not the issue, it’s just I guess I need someone who is kind of where I’m at in life, the phase I’m going through now.  I don’t want to step backwards.  Also, I struggle with my own ability to be responsible, and I often rebel against people, situations, and myself.  This means that if I am forced into responsibility by external things, like other people, and it’s not my own choosing or at my own pace, it could set me back.  I’m using psychology on myself.  Saying no to her was the result of self preservation, even if it was based on my superficial judgment of what she’s all about.  Of course, the superficial judgment was validated by my Gypsy psychicisms.  I didn’t say any of that to her, but I explained that I was interested in someone else.  She took it well, so I guess it’s not that big of a disappointment that she didn’t have a chance with me, even though I’m hardly some kind of slimy creep.

When I walked her to her door, her parents came out.  I didn’t like them.  In fact, they wicked sucked.  They shouted at her that she never called, and they shouted at me, saying, “what did you do to her?”  They blamed me still even after she described what happened.  They accused me of getting her drunk and taking advantage of her.  She said I didn’t, but they insisted she couldn’t know that if she was unconscious or blacked out.  I was sure they were going to call the police until they finally calmed down.  But they told me that if they find out anything happened, I’d better look out.  They also threatened that if I ever went there again or tried to contact her, I’d regret it.  Geesh, and I was feeling good about myself for being a nice guy.  After that I felt like an asshole even though I did nothing wrong.

And that’s the story of the drunken maiden that I haven’t seen since, and have no intentions of seeing again.  Bogart’s asked about her, wants her to come around to give him a blow job, even after he told her to her face that Megan was a stupid name.  I know that you Invisible Journal Reading People are probably wondering whatever happened with Bogart’s girl Ashley, but again, those details will come later.

My theme song for today is “Sunday Morning Coming Down” performed by Johnny Cash and written by Kris Kristofferson, because it reminds me how I used to be, just like the situation with Megan did.  I need these reminders to keep me from getting that way again.



previous Grimm 207: Brief Boringness, Undulating Brain Waves, and Grimm’s Philosophy of Attraction

next Grimm “The Absconded Journal of Wall Grimm as Told by Hasty” 209: Bogart and His Man Panties Full of Nuts

For a list with links to all the previous journal entries go to:

Check out the Character Directory Pages to learn about characters mentioned in each post.

Categories: JOURNAL ENTRIES 186-210 | Tags: , , , , , , , , , , , , | 18 Comments

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